Let me first start by saying that I’m not one of those people that says I’m anti social as a fashion statement. I don’t wave my freak flag high just to be different since being different is now popular. Go figure.
I don’t purposefully wear glasses to look smart.
I don’t put a lot of energy into hating what everyone else loves just to be different.
I don’t spend hours a day practicing how to ignore people or how to have witty replies that “snatch wigs”.
I don’t lose sleep at night thinking about ways that I can make myself look like I’m doing the exact opposite of what’s cool thereby making what I’m doing even cooler than what’s cool by default.
The truth of the matter is that when I say I don’t give a fuck, I sincerely mean it with all of my heart. When I say that I don’t care what everyone else is doing, it’s not because I’m being a condescending bitch, it’s just that I honestly DO NOT CARE WHAT EVERYONE ELSE IS DOING. As hard of a concept as that is for many to grasp, it is true and it’s my life.
I have learned a lot in the almost 4 decades that I’ve been on this planet. Many of the things I have learned, while they may seem trivial, have actually been very beneficial to me in my life journey. They have helped me to make better decisions and avoid unnecessary stress, pains, embarrassments, and drama. A lot of what I learned was from my own mistakes but a good amount was from listening to what I was told, and being observant, For instance, I’ve learned that granny panties don’t look good under leggings. I learned that cooking lasagna and cutting it the next day keeps it from being runny and falling apart. I’ve also learned that grown men who wear their keys on lanyards around their neck probably don’t change their underwear daily. While these are all very important gems of knowledge, I would have to say that the greatest and most important lesson I think I’ve ever learned in my lifetime has been to mind my own muthafuckin business.
Minding ones own muthafuckin business is about as important as breathing. As a matter of fact, one of the leading silent killers in our country today is the failure of minding ones own muthafuckin business. You don’t hear about it a lot on the news or in school, but trust and believe if you dig deep, you will soon discover that a lot of tragedies have stemmed from someone being nosey as fuck. Now, minding your own muthafuckin business is not to be confused with minding your own business. Minding your own business is simple. Almost everyone does it. All minding your business requires of you is that you be self aware and conscious of what’s going on in your own life. I think that many people mind their business on a daily basis. They pay their bills, they bathe, they feed their kids, they make sure that that their toenails don’t grow so long as to fuse with their skin. However, some people happen to be excellent multi taskers where they are able to not only mind their own business, but also that of various other people.
We all know people like this; Nosey Rosey’s and Messy Marvin’s. We all have at least 1 of them in our families or had/have one in our circle of friends. They are constantly stirring up drama and most likely have designated themselves as the “black sheep” of the family/friends to those who don’t know or who have yet to see how full of shit they really are. They don’t understand why they get avoided like the plague by people who used to consider them really good friends. They tend to have an abundance of associates, I dare call them friends because more than likely they have talked about, gossiped, or schemed on them.
People who don’t mind their own muthafuckin business are usually extremely messy, and usually never grow out of this behavior. It’s really sad because a lot of messy gossiping people I know have a lot of redeeming qualities such as great personalities, knowledgeable about useful things like couponing, and they tend to be extremely funny…especially when they are talking about other folk. The reason for this though, is because they need to be likeable in order to stay in the middle of shit. Personally, I see these types on social media more than anywhere else. They always have strong opinions about the affairs of other people and are very free with unsolicited advise. Usually they feel qualified to issue this advise based on their social or economic status; to some, money and the amount of followers you have make you an authority on various subjects. At the same time, they act wounded when said advice, often bad advice, is received and taken for what it is…trash. They usually cannot handle the “take it” part that follows the “dishing out”. This is where minding your own muthafuckin business comes in handy and clutch every single gawt damn time.
You see, one who has mastered the art of minding their own muthafuckin business, has reached the zenith of both psychological and emotional maturity. This person is most likely in the meta stage of self awareness and the zero fucks stage of Fucks to Give. Minding your own muthafuckin business transcends the requirements of just minding your business. It’s so next level that people usually assume that when you are simply minding your own muthafuckin business that you are in fact ignoring them or being a snob. It’s hard to comprehend, but at the same time so simple.
To make it easier for those who are confused, I have compiled a short list if behaviors and characteristics of people who mind their own muthafuckin business to utilize as a cross reference. This can also be used as a guide for those that may struggle with understanding how/why they always find themselves in the middle of some drama.
- People that mind their own muthafuckin business barely browse through social media if at all. They also seldom talk on the telephone unless it’s to order carry out/delivery or an emergency. Many of them just post their content and go about their day. I cannot tell you the last time I scrolled through Instagram or Facebook. Why would I? It’s filled with bundles of weave, outfits of the day, racist/bigoted/misogynistic and ignorant posts, and club pics; none of which I am interested in. If you are my friend and wonder why I never like your pics or posts, it’s probably because I never saw them.
- People who mind their own muthafuckin business are not always up to speed on what is happening in the world outside of their bubble. They tend to be oblivious on the latest scandals, especially those that involve Z list celebs and/or reality tv. Every time my friends start telling me things about the latest trash around our city or something about one of those damn reality tv people, it’s like a whole 15 minute conversation of them trying to acclimate me to the person whom they speak of. The conversations always end with me still not knowing who the people are or what the hell happened. Sometimes hearing gossip can be funny, especially when you feel like someone’s karma just kicked in, however, many people who enjoy hearing about other people’s karma usually have shit of their own that they should be worried about.
- People who mind their own muthafuckin business tend to be great listeners because half of the time, they are tuning you out. I find myself saying “that’s crazy” a lot during conversations because I am trying to figure out why I am being told what I am being told. I also get the “I told you about that last week” a lot, because if it doesn’t really affect me, I think I subconsciously purge it from my memory. Also, I only do this when it’s nothing important.
- People who mind their own muthafuckin business don’t generally give people unsolicited advice via Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, or other forms of communication. Actually, this is what made me write this post. After the news broke of Halle Berry and her husband allegedly divorcing, all of these people started posting comments, mostly negative. One of the comments seemed to make me a bit more upset than the others because for several reasons, one of which was because it was from someone who had 0 business giving ANY kind of relationship advice to ANYONE. Teri McMillian took to Twitter to say that Halle Berry should just “give up on mariage” and when I tell you she got the business by black twitter!!!! I just don’t understand how a woman who wrote a book and made a movie based on her relationship that turned out to be a sham, feels entitled to tell anyone that they should give up on marriage. As a general rule, people who mind their own muthafuckin business don’t usually tell anyone who they should be having sex with, dating, marrying, living with, having kids with, or marrying. The reason for this is because unless you are dating/marrying/sleeping with them or their significant other, it is non of your gawt damn business. Period.
- People who mind their own muthafuckin business don’t usually travel in packs. I really don’t feel like I need to explain this one if you are a human and are familiar with human nature. While it’s cool to have friends that you can talk to and hang out with occasionally, as both life and maturity start to take full bloom, sometimes you just need time to yourself. People who mind their own muthafuckin business have discovered the secret to less drama and less stress, is simply minimizing social interactions with people. Now, this is not to say become a hermit, but dealing with people in a social setting in smaller doses than usual, tends to add up to a more productive, carefree, less messy, and satisfying life for many. If you find that you are constantly in and out of drama and changing friends almost as often as you change your drowse, this just may be the solution for you.
Are you someone who minds thier own muthafuckin business? Are you not as successful at minding your own muthafuckin business as you would like to be? Do you have other charaterictics and behaviors that you think should be added to the list? Email us or comment below!
We would love your muthafuckin feedback!